Breaking the Mold: Redefining Your Relationship with Alcohol
If you’re anything like me, you may have found yourself wanting to drink less alcohol but confused about what that looks like. I recently shared my experience about how the shame-based approach of Alcoholics Anonymous acted as a barrier, preventing me from seeking help when I was trying to change my relationship with alcohol. I had internalized conditioned beliefs that wanting to drink less meant there was something wrong with me, and I didn’t want anyone else to see me in that light. Not only have we come to accept AA’s position as indisputable gospel, but these ideas have remained largely static since 1935 – even as our understanding of the brain has advanced significantly. I’d like to present a different view and a more compassionate approach to changing drinking habits.
Finding a Middle Ground
While physical addiction to alcohol is a real concern for some individuals, many of us questioning our drinking habits are not grappling with the physiological dependence that characterizes addiction. Instead, we find ourselves somewhere in the middle, repeating habits of behavior that have been learned and cultivated over time, often turning to alcohol as a coping mechanism in response to the unique pressures and stresses of veterinary medicine.
This phenomenon – called gray area drinking – recognizes a spectrum of drinking behaviors, and is best understood when viewed through the lens of habit formation rather than physical addiction. This distinction shifts the focus from a disease model to a behavioral one, acknowledging that changing one's relationship with alcohol may not require a spiritual or medical solution but rather a reprogramming of the brain's habitual pathways.
This perspective encourages us to consider a more nuanced approach that takes into account the diversity of drinking behaviors and habits, ultimately leading to more tailored and effective strategies for those looking to make positive changes in their relationship with alcohol.
Unlocking Changes in Drinking Habits: Shifting from Shame to Compassion
The science of habits demonstrates that our behaviors are intricately tied to learned cycles and reward pathways within our brains, wholly divorced from understandings of right versus wrong. When we repeatedly engage in a particular behavior, such as drinking alcohol, our brain forms neural connections that reinforce this habit, making it more automatic and challenging to change. Until we equip our brains with new skills and pathways, we will instinctively follow familiar patterns—a crucial insight for those seeking to change their drinking habits.
It's important to recognize that willpower and sheer discipline alone are not the magic keys to unlocking changes in drinking habits, nor is attempting to become a fundamentally better person. If it was, we wouldn’t have to work so hard to exercise and eat our veggies! Instead, we must reframe our view of the brain’s role in habit formation and recognize that our brain can be a tool in transforming our lives.
Many of the things we've been taught about drinking and the beliefs we've come to adopt simply do not fit the complexities of individual experience. You don’t need to commit to a lifelong pledge of sobriety to change. The journey begins by finding an approach that aligns with your personal needs and values. It involves careful examination and the acknowledgment that there is no one-size-fits-all solution. We must first dismantle the layers of socialization and conditioning that have shaped our beliefs around alcohol to engage in this more compassionate approach.
A Mindful Path Forward
In the demanding world of veterinary medicine, where anxiety, depression, and moral stress accompany the wide range of emotions experienced in a single day, it is important to reevaluate our relationship to coping mechanisms such as alcohol. The traditional AA approach, while effective for some, falls short of meeting the diverse needs of veterinary professionals and others who find themselves in the gray area of drinking habits.
I encourage you to engage in self-reflection about your own relationship with alcohol and the societal conditioning that has influenced your beliefs, and in doing so, remember the power of self-compassion. Your brain is your most potent ally, and change is possible when approached with compassion. Recognize that feelings of uncertainty or hopelessness regarding your drinking habits are not insurmountable obstacles; they are signals pointing you toward the need for support and understanding. Rather than feeling isolated by outdated approaches, connect with like-minded individuals who you relate to and who can offer experience and guidance.
Navigating the demanding terrain of veterinary medicine while facing the nuances of gray area drinking means taking a personalized approach to redefining your relationship with alcohol– one that aligns with your individual needs and values. Only you have the power to choose what works best for you; now is the time to take action and forge a path that leads to your well-being.
Take the First Step
Are you curious about changing your relationship with alcohol but don’t know how to begin? Many challenges ask you to attempt complete abstinence, and this may not be something you're interested in right now. Instead, try starting with an exploration of mindful drinking by joining the Unlocking VetMed Sober-ISH October Challenge!
Here’s What You Will Need:
Download a free app to track your drinking such as TryDry.
Get a small notebook to record your thoughts.
Recruit friends – create your own community.
Follow along with @unlocking_vetmed on Instagram for 30 days of tips.
Dr. Caitlin Vaughn has a dream to leave the world of veterinary medicine better than she found it. She wants you to know you’re not alone if you feel trapped in a long cycle of behavior, blame, and shame. With extensive experience as veterinarian and bolstered by certifications in coaching, habit transformation, and compassion fatigue management, she is dedicated to helping you break free from this pattern and embark on a transformative journey towards positive change. You can find her at unlockingvetmed.com or caitlin@unlockingvetmed.com
